Conspiracy and cookies.

There is no way I can sit through a three and half hour movie without doing something else at the same time. Watching Titanic in the theater doesn't count because I was in high school and my friends and I had sneaked half a convenience store's worth of sugar in with us. Resigned to being stuck inside last night because of craptastic weather and too stubborn to head to the gym to run on the treadmill, I decided I'd take a "rest day" after running my longest distance in 6 months on Monday. So while baking oatmeal dark chocolate chunk cookies, I watched the movie of the evening, Oliver Stone's JFK, a brain buster that is supposed to get you thinking about who killed JFK and why.

Now, I'm a JFK assassination conspiracy geek. I own the Warren Commission Report, I've read the autopsy (the photographs=nasty stuff), I've seen the Zapruder film like a million times, and I've read enough books about the subject that I could write my own screenplay. I'd been putting off watching the movie because I figured it would never live up to my expectations. Turns out that I was right. It didn't come close. I was especially annoyed at the diatribe about extra protection being called off and the Secret Service being understaffed that day as if to make them appear like their hands were clean in the whole subject. Maybe the information about the agents in the trailer car getting smashed and partying until 4am on Nov. 23rd wasn't available in 1991 when the movie was made, but I really doubt that. Had they not been hungover, maybe they could have spotted a rifle propped out a window or up on the grassy knoll. Or maybe they would have been sharper in the mind to notice the motorcycle cops were trailing behind rather than beside the President, leaving him to become a sitting duck. Or maybe... I'll stop now before I ramble even more. The movie could have been better, MUCH better. I'll just leave it at that.

The cookies were good though. I'm sure I'll be cursing them this evening on my run.

Lost in the suburban jungle.

My plan was just to take a quick little run around the lake and loop back home. After a nice warm up, I crossed the street and headed up the hill. This was new territory for me. I'd charted my path with the trusty Google pedometer thingy bopper. My memory was telling me that it was about a 1.5 mile loop around the lake. All I had to do was pick the right path whenever confronted with a fork in the road. And that's what I did.

The rolling hills were a nice change of pace. The drivers speeding by at 45mph or so were a tad worrying, especially when I ran out of sidewalk and had to hop onto the asphalt. For about a quarter mile I felt like I had been displaced to the East coast. Along the shoreline there was a little sailboat and some little ivy league style crew boats lined up. It made me think of Boston. I'd like to go back to Boston some day. And eat Boston Creme Pie while in Boston. It just seems like it would be superior there than anywhere else.

I could see the lake during most of the run so I knew that I'd at least stayed to the right as planned. I noticed a traffic light through trees and thought, "That's not right." I glanced behind me, as I often do, just to make sure no creepy Home Alone vans are following me and noticed a runner and his golden retriever hot on my tail. The din of the dog tags got closer. I was surely going to be passed, but they went left and I went right and that's when I began to think that something had gone wrong. My thoughts..."Landings??? You've got be kidding me? I'm so not where I should be." I was about a mile past where I thought I was going to come out. FUN! So I head east thinking that I'll just keep running until it hurts and then I'll walk.

I kept plugging along. I was in the groove. I wasn't breathing hard and my .mp3 player and various other random thoughts, like Boston Creme Pie, kept me running. I made it all the way to where I began without stopping for a single walk break!! 32:36 minutes. Woohoo! It had to have been at least 3 miles, I thought. According to the stupid Google thing, it was 2.7 miles, which, once again, confirms my turtle tendencies! So me running the Boston Marathon - at least any time soon - may be a bit of a stretch. I guess I can take comfort in knowing that I can tackle a Boston Creme Pie any day of the week!

....definitely the road less traveled.

After a weekend of fun with the girls I managed to go running yesterday. It probably wasn't the greatest idea to head out running in the afternoon with only coffee and a turkey sandwich in my stomach. It was incredibly hot. Ok, I know 85 degrees isn't hot, but I don't spend much time outdoors during the daylight hours these days so it was hotter than I expected. Mix the heat with being dehydrated and you get me struggling for most of the three miles. Water is my friend, heat is not. At least I managed to run instead of calling it a day and plopping on the couch.

I got some quality time with my nephew last night. He's growing like a weed. My brother needs to stop watering him or something. It turns out that my brother's neighbors are the parents of a bunch of kids we went to elementary through high school with. So they ended up popping over to say Hi. All of their kids that we went to school with are married and have kids. Now that my brother and his wife are the perfect white picket fence family, I always feel like the freak of the family when it comes to the updating other people on the family going-ons. My parents can brag about their grandson, and even my Idaho brother being a cop now. My story always seems to be the same - single, no kids, still in school, and a few cats shy of becoming the freaky cat woman/old maid.

It's all good though. I'll get there eventually - in a very long, roundabout way. I just wish there wasn't this weird stigma attached to still being in school. My mom always says, "I don't know where you got that gene for liking school so much." Neither do I, but I'm glad I have it because it terrifies the crap out of me to think about where I'd be now if I hadn't gone to UW or decided to go back to school to get my Master's. I just have that feeling I wouldn't be as happy and optimistic as I am now had I taken another path.

Oh, and working all day, by myself, in this huge building, is incredibly boring.

Ivory Tower Inadequacy

It amazes me how one hallway can be so intimidating while at the same time be so welcoming and inspiring. It makes no difference what time of day, what my mission is or how long I'm there, a visit to the History department is always a thought provoking trip. I get this overwhelming feeling that I'm surrounded by so many intelligent people and that I'm so entirely inadequate to be in the same league with any of them. That's not to imply that I am in the same league - I'm not. I realize they are professors, and I'm a meager student. It just seems like that even after years of studying, I'll never reach their level of expertise. That certainly won't discourage me from trying though. Any visit to the department just leaves me more motivated to try harder. I always say to myself when leaving, "I'm just going to have to work harder. And read more!"

Dr. Smoak was the only person I passed in the hall today. Of all the people I had to pass, it would be him. I'm in awe of this guy. I've only had one class with him and was convinced that if that's what it takes to be a professor, I could never hack it. He's the type of guy that if you were to see him on the street, you'd know he was smart. He looks the part. He's not very gregarious though, which is very odd for a history professor. I think that adds to his mystique. Anywho, I had a horrifying thought while walking back to my motorcycle....What if I'm appointed as his GTA in the fall? It was the most overwhelming "Holy Chickens" moment ever, causing me to stop briefly in panic. "I'm just going to have to work harder. And read more! ... I'm just going to have to work harder. And read more!" That may become my new mantra in life. I'll have it printed on t-shirts. Maybe I can sell them to other inadequate graduate students.

Grrr, I'm frustrated...among other things.

I want to vent. About what? I'm not sure. Everything, possibly. I just know that I'm bored and frustrated, so something must be up. I had the grand plan to get up this morning and run. The phone alarm went off at 4:45. My first thought was, "No bleepin' way am I going running!" I went back to sleep. The floor is painful. The first few nights, the floor wasn't so bad. It helped my back feel straight and not so kinky. Now, the floor hurts. It's hard and it's cold. One more day was all I needed to finish painting but nooooo, I had to go back to work. Now the entire contents of my bedroom are still strewn about my living room. I'm tripping. I'm stubbing my toes. I'm panicking because I keep losing my cat in the mess and think that he's either squashed or asphyxiated from paint fumes. I'm almost certain the damn cat doesn't know his name. He only appears when I rattle the food dish. Then I feel guilty for teasing him with food and end up feeding him some. No wonder he's over weight. It's probably just one sick game to him.

Between another brutal night of volleyball and a weekend of painting and sleeping on the floor, my body feels like it's been a hit by a truck. I haven't been running in like a week a now. A week tomorrow. I hate that thought because it just means it's going to be harder the next time I run. I'm thinking about throwing my whole stupid 8 week plan thing out the window. I didn't need it the first time I started running. I ran when I felt like it for as long as I felt like it. So, I'll just run until I don't want to run any more and see what happens. My level of unrest lately may put me somewhere in Canada by the time I stop.

And I'm SO frickin' on the fence about getting a dog. I filled out the adoption application online today.... and then deleted it. I keep going back and looking at the available dogs. I could make it work. I realize I'm busy but it's like other things that come along in life, you adjust and continue on. I could adjust! Then I hear my mom in my head, "You have a dog." No, I really don't, but she'll just keeping grinding away at me and make me feel guilty for wanting something. Grrrr.

I watched this movie called History Boys the other night - frickin' waste of my time. Stupid British cinema. It was uninspiring and rather crude. And having to watch people smoke like chimneys for two hours made me sick to my stomach. I was more than happy to send that one back to Netflix with a zero rating. I have no clue what movie will show up in my mailbox next - simply because I'm too lazy to log into Netflix and check - but I'm positive it will be a million times better than the rubbish that was History Boys.

Ok, I shall drown my grumpiness with a West Wing mini-marathon.

I'm a bum.

No run today. I'm a bum. A tired bum. I had a brief moment of motivation but it quickly disappeared after unloading my car after shopping. I have paint. I have flowers. And I have the entire weekend to myself to work on my home! I haven't accomplished anything tonight other than play on the computer. I certainly hope this passes before tomorrow!

In my bum like zen state, I've been watching the first season of Gilmore Girls on DVD. It's kind of been a way to heal the wounds of the season ending this past Tuesday. It's nice to know that I can always go back and enjoy the show on DVD any time I like. Or at least seasons One, Two, and Four any time I like. I'll have to fill the gaps, I know. I honestly think I could go for like a year without cable, playing ever DVD and video I own and not have to turn off the television. It's no wonder I go through a DVD player every year.

Anywho, I'm going to drag my bum to bed. Hopefully, I wake up refreshed and very, very motivated!

Light and Breezy

I know I'm posting this out of order and what not but it's my blog and I can do as I wish. Before the movie yesterday I did manage to get in my run/walk for the day. Seeing how I slept in and didn't do the whole morning run/walk thing as planned. As I mentioned before, it's still an attempt at becoming a morning runner! When I finally did get around to the running thing it went really well. I was kind of wimping around all day yesterday because of my strained/sprained ankle from volleyball on Monday. I wasn't sure if I'd be able to run, but apparently it's a different muscle or something than one I use for running because it didn't bother me a bit.

And for the first time I wore my Walt Disney World 1/2 Marathon technical shirt that I got when I picked up my bib number and stuff, like a year and a half ago. It's white, a color I don't usually wear, but I wanted to wear a light long sleeve shirt. Anyways...it's now my favorite shirt. I'm going to try tracking down the brand and style and see if I can just buy plain ones, in other colors. It was just so light and breezy. Yes, I'm a dork. But I'm a dork with a cool shirt!